My shining star...Twinkle

My shining star. No longer here with me in the flesh, but in the spirit. Miss you Twinkle.

 

He was such a handsome cat :O No doubt about it! Love the collar, I can see you kept him so well groomed I used to have a kitty that was of the same yellow color, but no white chest. Sweetest little kitty ever!

 

From the time I started to let him outside (big mistake) the collars would go missing so I had stopped buying them.He was so low maintenance. He was naturally sweet and his tail was something else. I have been encouraged to get another but I am in no rush. I feel like I will always be comparing and I am afraid to be attached and then feel that pain again. I still tell everyone over and over again, I never knew I could love a cat like that. I am going to throw some roses on his "grave" a little later.

 

Oh You do really sound like you loved him soooo much! Kudos to you for that, I try to imagine what it would be like if my mom ever felt that for a cat, she is a dog person. It'd be so fascinating. Take your time, is never easy to find another kitty, plus yes, one always starts comparing at first,

 

If ever something surprised me in my near 50 years of existence it was my love for Twinkle. I can't explain it. I always say he sneaked up on me and stole my heart and from everything I have read he was the RIGHT one for me. They say they find us and I guess he found me.

 

Anne, am curious You said you were a dog person before all this... my mom is a dog person too, but I doubt she will ever like cats, let alone own one. Before this kitty came into your life... what did you think about cats? Did you think they were kinda creepy (like my mom does) or you just didn't feel interested in them?

 

Just that Trellum. These creepy little creature that had this sinister snarl like you see in the movies. I never knew how adorable they were. I think it's a childhood fear. My mom tells me that my older sister long decease had a cat and cried uncontrollably when it died. She told me that when she was trying to console me when Twinkle passed on.

I feel it has to be the right cat for your mom to soften up. Twinkle was the right cat for me.

 

Oh, sorry to hear about your sister. I used to have chicken as pets when little, I cried uncontrollably when they died I'd honestly be amazed if she did, I really think hell would freeze before that even happened, hehehehe. But I'd definitely pay to see that :O She is stubborn tho... so stubborn! But who knows, maybe one day

 

If I can be converted, I feel anyone can. Truth be told it's that my son who was behind all my conversions and not being able to say no to him made caused my weakening. He's the one who has the pet fever and wants to save the world of pets. I don't know if you can still play on your mom's heart at your age but you can try.

 

Hehehehe, I'm not that charming anymore I've lost all my charm! I had more charm when I was 15 years old or so, but now I'm a couple years shy from the double of that age, hehehe, so I no longer have such an impact Would be funny to see her loving a cat very much.

 

Just catching up on some of the threads and noticed this one. I do so understand how much pain there is when any of us lose our good cat friends. They are like family, and sometimes, they are even closer to us than family. Thank heavens for cathow, 'cause other people do understand that comment and don't judge it as weird.
The biggest problem with loving cats, is that they don't live as long as we do, and sooner or later, they have to cross over and we are left behind. I guess about the only way I've been able to cope with the loss is to tell myself, 'make a living memorial to all the great cats I've known and loved, and go help the next one in to our family.'
So sorry for your loss, Anne. I lost the love of my life, my writing partner for 13 years. My Ben Jamin. I will always adopt black cats to honor him, and let him know how much he meant to me.

 

Trellum, I am nearly at the big 50 and I still can work my charm on my now aged mom. I just feel like if the right cat touches her heart, she will be converted. These days when people say there are not cat people, I am not convinced because I know of my own experience. My only concern is if the cat does not have the personality that's inviting.

Kay Dougall, sorry for your lost. How long was your Ben with you? In my case Twinkle's life was way too short and that just rips me up at times. For months I swore I would never get another as I never wanted to feel that pain again and I did not want to make more mistakes. Thanks to the forum and people like Trellum I thought maybe I should think about getting another sooner rather than later. I am still not there yet and the fact that I just took in another dog makes me think it is going to later rather than sooner.

 

Hi Anne,
The story of my Ben Jamin is a very interesting one indeed. He was 15 when he died peacefully at home after a long bout with kidney failure. I lost him five years ago, and I still miss him every day of my life. He is buried in our pet cemetery in our back yard. And I was very touched when you said that you placed roses on Twinkle's grave. Because I burn candles occasionally on Benny's grave, and place flowers as well. But I will save his story for another post.
It really doesn't matter whether you take in a kid or a dog or a cat, or whatever, as long as you know in your heart that it is a good thing to do for your household, your family. I'm glad you adopted another companion in need of a good home. Your dog will enrich your life as much as another cat.

 

So here is the thing Kay. I am actually getting a little emotional right about now but that's okay. It happens. There was something about Twinkle that in my heart just makes him irreplaceable. I don't know if there is a sweetness in death but I always talk about losing my father and sister and I always say my dad died a sweeter death. He died of prostrate cancer with his daughter rubbing his head, and his kids showering him with love in his bed at a ripe old age. My sister on the other hand died in a hospital bed sad and miserable with poor care and at the age of 44. I feel that as a family we made some mistakes with her and her death was not "sweet".

Here's the thing withTwinkle. I don't know how my Twinkle died but I know he' would probably be alive had I kept him indoors. ( I am trying not to cry over spilled milk) His time here was so short. Just under a year and when I go to throw those flowers on the grave it's not in my big back yard where my two pups were buried it's on the same plot of land two lots down where I found him. That still makes me sad at times.

It so happened that my gardener was around the day I found him. From what I remember, I was so beaten up and hysterical and totally out of control by the time I could compose myself my cat was buried in the same spot where he was found. In my mind I feel like Twinkle's death was so horrid, did not get the burial he deserved and my mistakes contributed to his death when all he ever wanted to do was live. He just enjoyed life.

A day does not go by that I don't think of him. The only thing that brought me from the deep sadness I felt was my own son falling ill and then I had to pull myself together for him, My story is a long one and perhaps for another thread as well, but Twinkle shone a light on my entire household and now he's gone I feel like life's a little darker no matter who comes home.

One day I hope to read more of Ben jamin's "sweet" life. While I still get sad about Twinkle I have come a long way and sometimes reading stories of other amazing cats brings me some joy.

 

Yeah To be honest I really don't know if my mom could ever feel that way for a cat, but a part of me likes to believe she could like cats Specially if it's a cat that behaves similarly to a dog. My mom has had such a tough life by the side of my dad. She needs all the love she can get!

 

And the right cat can give her all that love and more. I am living testimony. I guess it isn't something you force and of course we all know that a dog can be much more loving and committed but at the end of the day it's still going to be what she's most comfortable with. Sometimes when friend ask me about life and how it is, I say God has been good to me " he's given me three dogs and a cat". That was when Twinkle was alive. Now I say. "he's given me four dogs". My son and husband might not find that funny, but the truth is the pets do occupy in special place in our hearts that sometimes humans have a hard time reaching.

 

Amen to that! But if I ever saw my mom loving a cat, genuinely... that would be the most shocking one in my life! I'd be very happy, because in a way I'd feel like my mom and I have more in common.It might sound crazy, but I'd like to see my mom loving and enjoying cats as much as I do! She is an extrovert and I'm introvert, I read that cat people are mostly introverts while dog ones are extroverts, but I know we all have a little of both. I'd still like to have more in common with my mom.

Yes, you are right, pets have special places in our hearts... I'll never forget that little ginger cat I lost to my mom's dog He was soooo sweet!

 

Dear Anne,

I am sorry to have missed your thread. I would like to thank you for sharing your beautiful words and stories about your Twinkle. It sounds like Twinkle touched your life, in such a special way. I can really relate and feel your surprised emotional attachment and bond with Twinkle. For I, too, have a cat, my Eddie pull at my heartstrings, in a way I never thought possible, as an adult (as a child, different story, I was the one in the family that just had to have a cat). Unlike you, we have always had a cat or cats in the house. However, after having children, all our of cats developed a closed relationship with one of the children. Of course, I have loved each and everyone of our pets, but sometimes there is just one that kind of sneaks up you, like you said, and you feel this love you never thought possible. Very difficult to explain or understand, unless you have it happen to you.

I think, it is a very special idea to plant roses on Twinkles grave. I am sure Twinkle thinks like it is a good idea too! We are getting ready for our annual summer trip to my parents country home, one of my sons first cats, lays in rest under the Willow tree, there. Through out the years, the kids and cousins have laid homemade crosses and stone collected out in the surrounding fields, as special tributes of remembrance for his cat. Upon our arrival, it will be one of the first places, we get out to see! For some reason, I feel like your Twinkle, is content in his resting place, too, even though it is not as close to your home, as you would like.

Again thanks for sharing such a lovely, touching memorial tribute about your Twinkle. I am sure, when the time is right, you will get another cat. Sure, one cat does not replace another, all of pets hold different special places in our life with everlasting fond memories, that will put a smile on our face for years to come! I am sorry to, also, hear about your loss of your beloved family members (sister and dad)! It is true, as mothers, we have to continue on and be strong because we have the responsibility (no matter how old our children are0 to be there for them, too! Have a blessed day!

 

Thank you Herman & Eddie for your kind words. It's so comforting when others understand. Incidentally, I am responding to this message today the memorial day at around this same time when I found Twinkle. On a good day, he'd be here right now playing with the dogs if he was not curled up sleeping or doing some other thing that made me smile. My dogs make me smile all the time, but when Twinkle made me smile, it was different. I can't explain it but I know what I experienced.

You never know what life is going to throw you, but it threw me a star and I am glad that I allowed him to be name Twinkle.

 

A perfect name for your twinkling star. Now, when you look up into the stars at night, your Twinkles is shining down upon you! Such, a beautiful name, by the way!

I am glad you got a chance to read my post, as you celebrate the memorial of your Twinkles. Seems like, a fitting time and way to respect this day in your life.

I can related with you about the daily routines of our pets. They always seem to be on a schedule. I am sure your dogs, as much as, they are not the same as your Twinkles still bring you some comfort, as you go through this mourning process.

I will keep you in my thoughts, and I hope you continue to share your knowledge and fond memories of Twinkles on this forum on a regular basis. Who knows, one day, soon, I might read that you have a new kitten or cat in your house!